I woke up this afternoon so tired and just didn’t want to do today. My day progressed into knitting and listening to podcast because I just could not manage to do anything else today with the last week events with my brother. He made it thru the amputation of his leg but is having another surgery tomorrow, for unknown reasons to me at this time. I just can’t believe that he is having to go thru all of this due to a fall off a ladder and his diabetes. It just goes to show you that taking care of our bodies should be on the top of our list of things to do. He will be going into a nursing home after he gets out of the hospital because he will need the 100% care his wife can not give him due to her own disability's . I have not talked to my mom much thru all this because I don’t know if she really wants to talk about it. I think that this has really made me see that we really along in this world with our feelings and trying to convey them to someone else is extremely hard. I am very thankful that I have the most loving man in my life that would do anything for me and is my rock. I thank God for him every day because without him I would be really lost in this world. My mood today has been horrible to say the least. I’m mad and sad all at the same time and just want to shut the world out! it always amazes me that people always want you around when your world is perfect, but the first sign that you are a little upset they are no were to be found because they don’t want to say “Im sorry” or “I’m here for you”>> the world has forgotten how to CARE about another human being. Its all about take and ME syndrome.. I have decided that I am going to do some work on giving more! I think our biggest and greatest works for man kind of done unspoken for … Its my mission to let God lead me in the path that I belong. I can not fight the whole world on my own. There has to be a place were I can just breath.